Money... for some it seems expendable and for others it is a sore subject. For me it is a difficult subject to approach. But after being married and living paycheck to paycheck for the last 3 years, Chris and I decided to see what we could do differently.
I try to be as transparent and open about our lives as I can. But for so long, this just felt too hard to admit to... but... we struggle with money. I felt convicted to share a little bit about us, our financial hardships and what we are doing differently to help set us on a more secure path with money.
We always got by, but we never felt comfortable at the end of each month, which was taking a small toll on our relationship with one another. I thought I knew what I was doing when it came to budgeting, however we have a love of celebrating the small stuff any thing/news/accomplishment can be celebrated, you also know how much I love doing house projects both big and small, and I thought being self-employed and running a multitude of side jobs would be a lot easier than it was. At the end of April we started reading Dave Ramsey's book "The Total Money Makeover."
We felt seen! So many before us, who were in a lot more trouble than we were, got out of debt faster than they ever thought they would, by simply following these baby steps he provides. We looked at one another and agreed to give it a go.
We focused on May and cut costs: getting rid of any unnecessary or overlooked subscriptions. Then we created a better budget and I went in search of a job that I could make consistent money but also wouldn't affect my summer babysitting commitments and was something that fit me and my skills. I found a job cleaning a home 3 days a week, 4 hours each day at a rate that exceeded my expectations. We had a few hiccups with fixing our lawn mower and cheated a few times by eating out, but we still ended the month of May feeling comfortable.
Now that we are into July we are looking at being able to put $1000 into a savings account with plenty left in our checking account! It's only been 2 full months and we are seeing progress.
I think I was so focused on what our lives could be like as future parents that I was personally seeking those types of jobs that allowed me to work from home. But I wasn't seeing any profit from it! My personality really fits best in service jobs like childcare and house keeping and if I make a little bit of extra cash with those side jobs then GREAT. But right now we need me to have a steadier flow of income.
Our lives haven't gone the way we wanted, as far as becoming parents is concerned. But I believe this is one of those reasons. Yes I know plenty of people with money struggles who were blessed with kids faster than us, but our story is ours and for whatever reason, God wants this to be a focus while we wait. And I am so grateful! Once kids come into our lives we will have the tools to raise them to be wise with money, or at least wiser than we were! I also want to explain that Chris and I had different upbringings around money, and neither of them helped our spending habits and financial decisions. I'm not blaming our parents, in fact both sets gave each of us valuable money lessons when growing up... one of those being to stay away from credit cards... something neither of us did!
"To err is human"
after all and what matters is moving forward and upward and changing our own habits.
Money had become such a sore point in our marriage, that we both were uncomfortable and maybe had a little too much pride to reach out and seek an alternative route. Now that we have, we can see a light at the end of our tunnel. It's not easy talking about money, especially when it's tight. But doing the next right thing is better than dodging those harsh and real financial bullets all the time.
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