Our Anointing

In our journey to parenthood we have focused a lot on our physical health. Mostly because with our original "diagnosis" that was one of the only things recommended for us to do.

We also are constantly working on our mental health and the one other truly important aspect of our lives, is the most important: our spiritual life. Chris and I have grown over the last 4 years of being in a relationship with one another, and our spiritual growth is no exception. When we first met, I was not personally attached to the church I was attending. In fact I got by, viewing church from my bedroom most Sundays (this was pre-pandemic even!). Chris was a lot more involved with his church and soon after attending, I started serving on the worship team with him, as well as attending a Go Group during the week and church every Sunday. Then we hit a rough patch with the church shortly after we got married. We prayed for God to give us direction and our Pastor Matt emailed us, this was our answer to prayer and for more details of that story you can visit my post about it HERE.

2020 was a weird year for our faith. There was so much uncertainty and fear, with the pandemic, turmoil in our nation and our own personal things going on in life but we learned a lot about who God is and learned more than ever to trust in Him.

2021 I wanted to become more involved and so I started serving on two teams at church. I also wanted to strengthen my personal relationship with God and I got serious about prayer and reading my Bible every day. It helped me overcome the pain in our waiting to conceive a child. Chris started feeling a genuine desire to become a father and with that came his own hurt and learning how to lean on God in his own time. Which was hard for me to watch, but I learned how to be supportive during his own journey.

Now we have begun a new year and we wanted to take our faith in God's perfect plans and timing in this specific area of our lives a step further. My dad was diagnosed with colon cancer a few years ago and the church held an anointing ceremony for him. My mom brought up the idea of doing this for Chris and I as a next step in our journey, so I reached out to our Pastor and asked if we could set something up. We wanted it to be a small intimate ceremony and we knew we wanted it to be in January, the start of a New Year. If you follow along here you'll recall my feelings on our 2 years of trying. I realized my life has a positive occurrence around the number "2." And as I reflected I started thinking 2022 could be something special. I really wanted to set our anointing date for Saturday the 22nd, but our pastor was not available for that date, so we settled on the 23rd.

The week before our original anointing ceremony we came down with Covid and so we were forced to push out our ceremony! Since we still wanted it to be toward the beginning of the year, and we had all of the details arranged we wanted it to be soon. My feelings around the number "2" were really strong and so I asked if we could reschedule for either February 2nd or 22nd. Our pastor was available on the 2nd but Chris' parents were out of town! We asked our pastor if he was available on the 22nd but he was going to be getting home from out of town on that day. The next available was Sunday, February 27th. We took it as a sign from God to quit forcing our hand in this and leave it in His hands, clearly we were meant to host this event on an odd date and so we set it.

That morning we woke up and got ready for church and as I flipped to the date on our Bible verse calendar, I felt God’s spirit. “Christ has poured out His Spirit on you.” 1 John 2:27. We may have wanted our ceremony on a “2” date, but God’s timing is best and I felt Him reaffirming that to me when I read those words. And to top it all off I looked in my ESV (English Standard Version) Bible to read this verse and it talks about anointing SPECIFICALLY!!! God is amazing.

I also made the decision to wear this necklace. A little backstory… December of 2020, before Premier Designs went out of business, I wanted to purchase the Morse Code necklace that they used to manufacture. They had ones that spelled out “daughter” “survivor” “friend” “grandmother” and “mother.” I knew someday I would want the “mother” necklace for the day we were given our blessing, so I purchased it and kept it in the box next to my jewelry. Today was the first day I opened it up and wore it. I am a mother, not in the societal sense, currently in life. But I am a mother and I knew what this afternoon would represent and how special it would mean to me to wear it while getting anointed.

The ceremony began with our loved ones and us gathered around in a circle. We did a call and response prayer and our pastor prayed over us with a special prayer

"We remember all of those who are waiting with empty arms for families not yet realized, for children who remain an illusive dream. Give them hope when hope is illusive. Give them comfort when comfort is illusive. Give them a way forward when a way forward is illusive. Steel up their bodies and their spirits for the testing and the procedures and the waiting, and the waiting. Sanctify their uncertainty. Bring them full hearts and full homes."

Then Chris and I knelt at the foot of the cross, what a powerful symbol alone! I think of how Christ died on the cross for all of us, and how humbling it is to sit at His feet. Our loved ones placed their hands on us and Pastor Matt anointed us with oil, a sign of the cross on our foreheads and prayed over us.

Finally we lit a candle, something to serve as a physical reminder of this day. We chose a candle that has scents associated with fertility: sage, lavender, citrus and wood. And then, anyone who felt lead could pray or share a thought. It was so emotional and while we were praying the flame of the candle grew bigger. Once the prayer ended the flame grew smaller. God was there I am certain! His presence was so evident and His spirit filled the space.

We have a special home for our candle, right on the mantle, to remind us of how good our God is, even when... and no matter what.

Sometimes, throughout this journey I have wondered how important of a role does God actually play? We live in a "do it yourself" culture and because of that we assume we need to change our diet, stop taking certain meds, undergo treatments and change ourselves to create a family. And while I believe all of those things can help, they are not always necessary. Believing in the power of God, of the Holy Spirit and having our burdens carried by Him is just one step we found helpful, therapeutic and necessary in our journey to parenthood. However God reveals it to us we will be ready, we will be grateful and we will listen, for He is good and His love never fails!